The Greatest Gift EVER!!!

Yesterday I found myself reading through passages written in my personal journal. I came across the following written 12/2/15 and decided it was too good not to share.

The greatest gift God has ever given me is my life. Yes, he sent His son, but Jesus was sent so that I could live an abundant life. God desired so desperately for me to live my life abundantly that He sacrificed His only begotten son to see it happen. That's how valuable my life is. That's why I say it is the greatest gift God has ever given me. 

Since this gift is so precious and valuable, shouldn't I be doing something with it? Don't I owe it to God to produce something with this life He's given me? Going through life simply going to work, church, and back home....never stepping outside of my comfort zone, never sparking fire in the heart and mind of my neighbor, never giving birth to anything, never doing anything with the ideas I have...aren't these things like taking God's most precious gift, placing it on a shelf and forgetting about it? 

Now is the moment, now is the time for me to open my eyes and experience life. Now is the time to achieve abundance as it has been uniquely designed for me. The time is right now. I am creative and I hold the power to create the life I desire. Now is the time to take full advantage of this beautiful gift I have been given.

16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. 17 For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. - John 3:16-17

10 The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have  come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. 11 “I am the good shepherd.  The good shepherd gives His life for the sheep. - John 10:10-11

You Are Just the Vessel

I LOVE music with a beautiful message...regardless of genre. I enjoy the TV show Nashville, not just for the story line, but for the beautiful music that is showcased week after week. God often speaks to me through music and even more so through the story behind the music. Once particular song stuck out to me this morning as I watched my recording of the show. It is called, "It Ain't Yours to Throw Away". The part of this song that grabbed me... "What if you're just a vessel and God gave you something special? It ain't yours to throw away. It ain't yours to throw away. Every time you open up your mouth, diamonds come rolling out, It ain't yours to throw away..." Please listen to the song before continuing...

It Ain't Yours To Throw Away

Have you ever wanted to give up in the face of adversity? Have you ever had a moment so tough that it caused you to rethink everything you believed about yourself? Have you ever been told to stop dreaming about making it big and get a real job? Have you ever felt like what you are destined to do may just be too big for you to handle? When those moments of destiny homicide arise, remember this, you're just the vessel....It's not yours to throw away!!! Get up, dust yourself off, take up your cross and move towards your destiny! How can you give up on (throw away) something that is not even really yours?!?!? YOU ARE JUST THE VESSEL! The wine bottle doesn't say it can no longer hold the wine right? How then can you say you cannot carry something that you were created to hold until the appointed time and then release into the atmosphere!

That's what we are all created to do...hold, guard, nurture, protect our perspective destinies until the appointed time. When that time arises we MUST release that which we have carried! Just as in a natural pregnancy the final month is often the most uncomfortable. Expectant mothers are often anxious to give birth if for no other reason, they are excited to see their baby. Imagine the outrage at a mother that decides to "throw her baby away" in the 9th month! That's the equivalent of what we do when we throw away the seeds God plants inside of us when life gets difficult. Those seeds are precious and needed to impact this world! While we are the vessels, what is inside of us do not belong to us and therefore are not ours to throw away!

He Leads Me to His Best

"He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake" - Psalm 23:3

Have you ever wanted something so badly that the idea of God not doing it for you never even entered into your mind? Have you ever prayed, fasted, and stepped out on faith only to have the door slammed in your face? Well I have, and let me be the first to acknowledge this one truth everyone seems to shy away from...IT HURTS! It hurts when you feel like God did not give you the one thing you so earnestly desired. But allow me to let you in on one little secret; if God shuts a door, He does it so that He can point you in the direction of another one. He blocks door number one because while what lay behind the door may seem like it's good for you, He knows this door is not His BEST for you! His ultimate desire is for you to walk in His perfect will and experience His very best in every area of your life!!!

We often think of God leading us as Him speaking every direction into our spirit, but sometimes His leading comes in the form of a denial. He didn't allow you to get the $15/hour job, because he knew He had already prepared the $30/hour position. Your first record contract fell through because He knew the record label was filled with crooks and thieves! Your first business failed because God saw the direction you were headed in was not His plan for your future. Even in God's denial or blockage of what appears right in our own eyes, He is leading us to the prepared place which contains the blessings He has stored up for us!

It's easy to recognize His leading when it comes in a way you can understand, so let's start by understanding this...in all things God is leading you towards the path that was designed for your greater good. He loves you and desires to see you whole and complete. Instead of shedding tears when the next door slams shut in your face, understand that is God's way of letting you know that door was not His best for you! I am learning to stop crying over closed doors that are at best sub-par, and start looking for the doors that God is trying to lead me to! In all things, He leads me!

This is not an easy process because it requires a re-programming of my brain. It requires a consist reminder that the pain and disappointment that often accompanies a closed door is a humanistic reaction to a spiritual decision. We know God's ways are not our ways, yet we often expect Him to prepare things the way we would prepare them. When we want to teach our children a lesson, we often sit them down and talk to them. We express what we want them to learn and expect them to just "get it". God however, understands that in order to truly learn a lesson there must be some sort of application of the knowledge gained. This means when you hear a word from God concerning your future, there has to be some sort of corresponding action to put that word into practice. When it is time to begin making the steps towards positioning ourselves to receive what it is that God has spoken, we try to act based on how we "think" the plan should go. We often forget His ways are not our ways. So instead of rejoicing when He leads us by closing all of the wrong doors, we listen to the negative thoughts and ideas presented by our limited humanistic understanding rather than relying on the truth of His word! Instead of rejoicing at the closed door, which by the way is a beautiful example of the process of elimination, we become sad and disappointed. I am  attempting to grow into a place of maturity that will enable me to recognize the closed doors as a sign of God's process of elimination. When the wrong doors are closed around me, eventually I will be left with the right door! As this lesson is learned (through practical application) I will then be ready for God to simply point to the door and I walk right through it!

If you are tired of the emotional roller coaster that comes along with closed doors, I encourage you to go to God and ask Him to give you personal revelation of how and where He is leading you. In all things, His desire is for your best life here in the earth and after you take your final breath. Following His leading even in the painful places, puts you in a position to live as He originally intended...perfect and complete, lacking nothing!!! Stay in the process. The closed doors do not feel great, but eventually you will learn how to be guided to the right door the first time around!

Sure!

Welcome to 2014! Oh, is my welcome a tad bit delayed? Well, here is my explanation...

In November of 2013, my husband and I began to walk through the most difficult time in our marriage. We did not have marital issues, but we had plenty of life issues. The death of a parent, diagnoses of an illness in a child, a job lay off, financial strain....the list piled high! In December the Lord spoke to us and told us to uproot our family and move from North Carolina to California. California is the one state I specifically asked the Lord NOT to send us to...I should have known it was coming! The move was orchestrated in a way that let us know... God is definitely behind this. Then we arrived and things got WORSE!

I went through the toughest mental battle that I can remember in recent years. I wanted to lash out at my husband as the enemy threw thoughts and ideas at me that said he wasn't good enough, wasn't doing enough....basically nothing he was doing was right in my mind. In actuality my husband was doing everything in his power to hold it together, but the frustration of our situation was an open door for the enemy to toy with my mind. As I fuddled through my thoughts, God would whisper the truth to me which would keep me from going too far off of the ledge so I kept my mouth shut and my relationship with my amazing God-given husband in tact. But as the enemy often does...he would return a little while later to temp and torment me further. What makes the enemy's lies believable is the way he uses just enough truth to make you think everything he's saying is correct. Some of the thoughts he threw at me were rational and played to the weaknesses of my flesh. I allowed those things to stick and thus put me into a very negative head space.

Part of what led me to such a state was my desire to remain a stay at home mom. I prayed to God earnestly to remove me from my last job and fear made me believe going back to work meant going back into the same bondage and discontentment. My husband spoke to this fear and assured me it would be different this time, but all I kept thinking was, "Would God move me all the way to California just to go back to a job?" The idea both scared and infuriated me. I started to wonder if everything I'd heard from God concerning my career as a writer was my own wishful thinking. I cried and pleaded with God for guidance and reassurance, but He said nothing. I will share revelations I've learned regarding the delayed response in a different blog, but for now just know...that delay spoke VOLUMES!

When I felt I could not go on another day, a dear sister of mine asked me to call her. I'd avoided calling her because my own fear about going back to work made me think she'd judge me for my decision. In fairness to her, she's only shown me love and support in all of the years that I've known her, but again the enemy was playing in my mind. When I called her and told her about my job, she instantly said, "The Lord showed me a job for you, and I thought it was weird, but that's what He showed me." That's all I needed to hear to silence the fret inside of me that was consuming me daily over going to work. Let's be clear, I don't mind working, but I MUST first fulfill my duties as a wife and mother. It's difficult to work full time and take care of the home, but as long as I'm in the grace of God, I know I can do it. My fear was living outside of His grace.

Once I tackled the ridiculous fear of working again, God started to deal with me on other emotions that I was bottling inside; resentment, frustration, doubt...all were taking turns in my mind. When I realized it was starting to consume me I reached out to another sister and asked for her prayers. The very next day I heard God speak to my heart and I felt the spirit of torment BREAK! The prayers of my sisters found me at my weakest point and helped me over the hurdle of deep distress, sadness, and fear. I can't stress the importance of reaching out to like minded believers, but again...another topic for another blog posting.

The day the Lord spoke to me wasn't this huge event. I was driving and crying to Him saying, "Lord, I do not understand this. I know you, you know me. We talk. What's going on." In that moment the Lord spoke to my heart and said, "Yes, you do know Me!" I began to weep at that simple reply because He was right, I do know Him and to know Him is to know that NO MATTER WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE, HE WILL ALWAYS TAKE CARE OF ME! I felt an assurance rise up in me that I have never experienced before. He comforted my soul and gave me peace! I know Him. He is ALWAYS in control! Whatever He wants will happen!

The very first scripture I learned when I came into relationship with God was Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord will all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path." I never thought this scripture would speak so clearly to me all these years later, but it did! All I had to do was trust Him! I may not have understood everything, but I understood the One who controls everything! From that day to this one I have watched God fulfill promises concerning our lives and one word has remained alive and well in my spirit... SURE! I am SURE I know my God and He will always deliver!

The Desperate Place

I recently watched a video in which Vashawn Mitchell spoke about the young man that wrote the song "Nobody Greater". Apparently the young man was going through an extremely difficult time in his life. He turned to God and began to pray and worship. As he did, the lyrics to "Nobody Greater" began to flow out of him.

My point? When you go before God with a heart of pure prayer and worship you may find that what you need to change your situation is already inside of you. The young man had lost his job, but the song that is arguably one of the most beautifully sincere gospel songs ever written was inside of him. The song has touched people all over the world, and has assuredly changed his financial situation! Had he not been in a desperate place, would he have ever gone to God and heard those words in his spirit?

Often times we find ourselves backed into a corner and instead of going to God with pure worship we go in a state of panic and self pity. We throw "tantrums" and whine about how unfair life is when in reality this is the time to enter into worship. Its easy to worship when your heart is filled with gratitude, but can you worship when everything around you seems terribly wrong? Can you worship when it feels like God is no longer there? This is the truth of who you are. Are you a worshiper or a whiner? Can you learn to appreciate the process that will propel you into your destiny?

Time and time again we've heard testimonies of God delivering people out of tough situations just in a nick of time. The saying "He's an on time God" is well known all over the world. Why then do we fret when it seems as though the world is crumbling around us? Does He not know and understand your need? Is there ever a chance of Him failing you or not providing for you? No....not a chance! It's time to learn to appreciate the desperate place and use it as it was originally intended....as a springboard for your success!  God was a master plan for your life. If you begin to worship Him from the depths of your being, you may be surprised at what flows out of you. The next worship song that brings people all over the world into a place of peace so that they may experience the presence of God may be right inside of you! The next book that helps point millions in the direction of healing and wholeness may be waiting on you to open your mouth and worship your Creator! Don't get lost in the desperate place...worship there!

Watch the video I am referring to here

Living 101

John 10:10

New King James Version (NKJV)

10 The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.

I have read this scripture many times over and never had the level of understanding that I do now that I am finally doing that which I was created to do....write. When I began writing a few years ago I never imagined I'd feel the type of freedom and excitement I now feel when I sit down at the computer and complete a compelling chapter or blog post. I did not remember the young girl I once was that won literary award after literary award based on my writing ability. I forgot all about the applause and praise I received because of my raw ability to create story lines that entertained the reader. Now that the Lord has opened eyes I feel like I am living for the first time. 

The above referenced scripture means more to me than it ever has before. I feel like I finally have life. I've had my relationship with the Lord for years now, so spiritually I was fulfilled. My relationship with Him gives me great peace and freedom, but the natural side of me was lacking something I couldn't quite put my finger on. I had a decent paying career that I was very good at, but it never  made me feel like I was impacting lives to the extent to which I desired. I began to search within myself and question the Lord as to what I was really intended to do.

A few nights later I had a dream. In that dream the characters were having a heated conversation directly in front of me. I wanted to intervene and help through the conversation to come to a resolution. When I tried to intervene I woke up. I remember sitting straight up in the bed and realizing the dream could become a novel if I could dedicate the time it took to write it. I went to my desk in the corner of my bedroom, turned on the lamp and began to write in one of the many journals I store on the desk. That night was when it first hit me. I have the talent, to open up a whole new world with my mind. I can create a space for the reader to escape to when he/she wants to escape life. At that moment I began to live in a new way. My natural fulfillment began to match my spiritual one.

You may be wondering why I am sharing this with you...well, I'm inclined to believe I am not alone in the quest for natural fulfillment. How many times have you gone to work at a job that you hate? How often do you ask yourself what you can do to satisfy the creative side of yourself? If you were able to do anything for the rest of your life would you keep doing what you are doing? Most people are not doing what they love, they do what pays the bills. I submit that is not living life more abundantly. Jesus came that we would not only be forgiven for our sins, but so that we could live the best possible life while we are here on the earth. Often times fear holds us back and prevents us from ever creating the opportunities that will open the doors of our future.

We have the spirit of the creator on the inside of us, that means we should be able to create opportunities that not only provide for us but also provide a little earthly happiness. I urge you to pull on that creative side and create your next opportunity. Begin to live in the destiny you were created for. Shake the fear that prevents you from starting that business, earning your degree, singing your original song, or penning your first novel. You were created with a purpose and ability to be able to create something out of nothing. Have the courage to live in the creative mindset you were born with! Go back to the child you once were and create an opportunity to live the dream life made you believe you could not achieve. As long as you're still alive, there is still time for you to wake up and begin walking in your destined place!

The Naked Place

Genesis 3:6-10 

So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings. And they heard the sound of the Lord walking in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, "Where are you?" So he said, "I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself."

Of course in modern day we do not sew together leaves to hide ourselves, but the principle is still alive today. When we do or experience things that we are ashamed of we hide behind our smiles, designer clothes, titles, jobs, etc... Even though we know our God already knows and sees all we still tend to try to "hide" those things we are ashamed of. We are afraid to be naked before our God because being naked means admitting our mistakes, pain, anguish, despair, and failure. We are afraid of the vulnerability our nakedness implies. When someone is naked, everything about their body is exposed. That is how God desires us to appear before Him.  Not physically naked, but emotionally and spiritually bare so that He can get to the root of our issues and heal us from the inside out. 

It's time for us to stop hiding behind our culture, education, money, designer clothing, nice homes, children, spouses, etc... and admit to our God that we are in need of His expert assistance to deal with the issues of our hearts. When we do not allow Him to clean our wounds properly, they do not heal properly. Just as a natural wound becomes infected when it is not properly cleaned, so does your heart. Our hearts have to be purged of every negative word ever spoken over our lives. We have to remain open before our King to allow Him to operate on the broken areas of our life. Our experiences catapult us toward our destiny and purpose when we allow Him access to every part of our being, but when we limit His access by hiding behind stuff, positions, and titles those same experiences begin to hold us captive.

God desires to make everything work together for our good, but He can only use what you allow Him to use. Before He can use it, you have to allow Him access so that He can help you process it properly. Yield to Him. Disrobe before Him (lay aside everything you use to cover your issues). Give Him every part of you so that He may free you and use you for His original intentions. Allow Him to take you back to whole place you were originally created to live in. The shame no longer belongs to you. Jesus took it away when He died on the cross. Give all of your issues over to Him so that you can live in total dominion in every area of your life!