2
Timothy 2:22-26
The Message (MSG)
22-26 Run away from infantile indulgence. Run after mature
righteousness—faith, love, peace—joining those who are in honest and serious
prayer before God. Refuse to get involved in inane discussions; they always end
up in fights. God’s servant must not be argumentative, but a gentle listener
and a teacher who keeps cool, working firmly but patiently with those who
refuse to obey. You never know how or when God might sober them up with a
change of heart and a turning to the truth, enabling them to escape the Devil’s
trap, where they are caught and held captive, forced to run his errands.
When I went through my divorce I decided being divorced
meant I never had to argue again. I
refused to go into another marriage filled with those types of emotions. Even though I said those things to myself, it
took the Lord stepping in and speaking directly to me for me to really get
it! He first brought the most gentle,
supportive, and loving soul into my life…my husband. When the Lord revealed to
me that Lyndell was my husband He gave me some very specific instructions. One of which was, “You must get control of
your mouth. He will not tolerate you speaking
to him any kind of way, he hates arguing”.
Its one thing for a person to demand your respect, it’s another when the
Lord tells you to give it! Because let’s
face it, speaking to each other properly is a form of respect. I must confess this has been an easier area
for me to watch my mouth because my husband ALWAYS speaks to me out of love and
respect.
(Side Note: the saying, “make-up sex is the best sex” is dysfunctional!!!!! What makes this more enjoyable is the raw passion the two parties share. In the interest of saving you both a lot of frustration and/or painful words, I urge you to find
a better, healthier way to express your passion and keep the spice in your marriage!)
The hard part for me has been learning to speak to others
with respect even when they do not do so with me. The scripture did not say only refrain from arguments when the other person is nice to you! We must always conduct ourselves according to this passage no matter how rude or unpolite the other person is. I will be the first person to confess I don’t always pass the test, but I continue
trying and with God's help I getting much better.
When the Lord spoke to me about
Lyndell I had no idea the above scripture even existed. When I came across the scripture one day in
my personal study time, I realized this not arguing thing went well beyond my
marriage. It’s His will for us to be “a
gentle listener and a teacher that keeps our cool”! That means even though you may be right,
there is still a correct way to present what you are trying to teach the other
person. Who listens when they are being
belittled, yelled at, or ridiculed?
Instead of listening to what you are saying (teaching), they go on the
defense and now neither of you are listening!
Another thing to remember is, you are a living witness! Everything you say and do reflects your walk
with Christ. Arguing with people affects
your witness. Will they hear you when
you try to share the love of God if you just cussed them out yesterday? Will
the unbelieving spouse come to Jesus if you are constantly yelling and fussing?
Can you pass the test of not being argumentative? Is it more important for you to express your
emotions, or for you to show Jesus to a dying world?!?!
We have to become better at showing His presence on the inside of us. We are His ambassadors here in the earth. When people see us, they have to see the love of Jesus. If we are arguing, Jesus is not being seen in us. Together, we can change this world! We can make a difference in the lives of those that are lost, but it starts with watching what we say and how we say it!
Love you all,
Otescia
